A pinch of Fashion, Beauty and Good food =) ^my personal Blog^

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Friends or no friends??

Hi loves =) Well i might not be posting as much as I want to but I'am trying to keep up with my blog, I've been really busy with all kinda stuff but anyways :) What i want to talk(write)about today is: "Friendship" Most of us have or had someone in their lives who we actually think/believe is or friend but also people who we hang out with and just concider someone who you just have funn with and then see if there's a friendship. But when do u concider someone your friend?? Do we need to know the person really well before calling him/her your friend? Is there any time attached to when u can concider someone a friend?? Or do you just concider someone automatically your friend because youve hanged out a couple of times?? So I have been asking my self some of these questions the last couple of weeks and i have come to the conclussion that everyone is different and everyone deals with friendship on their own way. Like for me for example I've known so many people while living in curacao and the netherlands and so many of them who I personally concidered my 'friends'. Some of them after a while u wont even hear of them anymore and some of them you know even if you dont speak with them for years you know they will always be there :) But what about the people who concider you a friend while u dont concider them a friend? Well.. Sometimes it can be like that and then you ask yourself how did that hAppen?? And then again the answer, everybody is different and everyone has their own time pace when it comes to calling someone a friend. But then again some people are just crazy by getting mad cause u didnt concider them friends while they did. And how do we deal these kind of persons?? Well i might not hAve an answer for that but what i do is just go with the flow and live by your own rules and not theirs. If u hurted someone on purpose then karma will come back around and if not well then u'll be sorry but atleast didnt go kuku nuts by trying to please them on their ideal perspective of friendship. Let me know what ur thoughts are about friendship.


  1. Hello my dear,

    I'm finding this a very intresting subject and want to comment the following. I don't think there is one universal answer to this question. And I think you are right by stating that essentially everyone determines for them selves when when they consider someone a friend. And I even think that people don't really have a rule for when they call other people their friends. You may know someone well and this person is not a friend, or you may not know someone well and this person may be a friend. You may expect a lot or little from friends and non-friends. You may say he or she is my friend if I am theirs. Or you just don't mind if you are a friend to them while you still consider them a friend. and this may be so for one person and not for the other. Maybe it boils down to how someone makes you feel. And if it's a feeling to be labeled with friendship then it just is.
    Hey dear. Much Love! I'm OUT.....

    1. I agree with your comment on this topic ;). And I also want to add that in friendship you may not treat someone with expectations or treat them a certain way because you are expecting something in return. It usualy is fair and best if two people who are hanging out or something similair to be open and honest about things because that would avoid allot of confusion and allot of messy situations! Be being open and honest it is not meant that you have to tell them your secrets or your life story :p it is just a way of starting with someone on a clean slate that will later not end up in confussions or misleading situations. But in the end everyone decides who they want to be friends with and everyone has the right to treat people the way they think is best.... only factor people never consider is "am I treating this person the way I want to be treated?" most of the time the answer is "No". Which is a sad thing, because the way you treat someone gives off a signal of the way you want to be treated. It is not something we consiously do, but for example if you are angry all the time people will also respond back to you with anger or things will not go so smoothly, but if you are a happy person and you treat people nice then you will notice that people are more friendly around you and you will be treated nicely back and things will go smoothly. It might sound silly but that's how it goes...

  2. Well this is a very interesting topic indeed. Friendship is considered friendship when both parties can respect each other the way they act/behave/think/etc.. and not trying to control each other on what they should do or behave like etc.. It is when you really accept someone for who they are. Which is in most cases hard to do for most people because everyone has had their share of bad experiences. But remember one thing.. is it fair to judge everyone new that comes allong in your life looking for friendship due to past experiences... would you think that's fair to you would be in the position of being judged?
    It's a difficult situation when you meet new people.. to go through the process of acceptance going with the flow could be good but it could also be misleading. Its a selfish decision if both parties do not decide give each other the space and the time to be themselves. True friendship doesn't come 123.... and true friendship is not only build on happy smiles and friendlyness... it also can have its up and downs.. that is what makes the friendship stronger.. If you have a fight with your friend or someone who is close to being a friend or someone who has treated you well.. something small like a stupid missunderstanding or misshappen or anything similair can not decide the rest of the to be friendship or on going friendship. Because in the end you must weigh it out... what are the possitives and what are the negatives... maybe it was harsh for the person you're talking about that you didn't consider them your friend ... but hey they will get over it right if it is worth it then.. if they had treated you right before...
    like you said yourself "everybody is different", with that said this means everyone reacts different as well.. if they thought it was harsh or acted crazy .. they probably have a reason for it... Basically friendship is something you can not have like 123!
    Time tells you who people really are and how they treated you when you needed them the most.. and how they treated you afterwards which lead to what you posted maybe its just a down side.. Like every other relationship it has it ups and downs ;)
    Take care dear!

  3. "But what about the people who concider you a friend while u dont concider them a friend?"
    Maybe u gave them the wrong idea when u where hangin out that u where friends by going out or sharing food or asking favours or anything in that direction.
    And if they find out ur not their friend they might feel used. u not concidering someone ur friend when they are treating u like one, that would be kinda messed up had rather blow them off so they got the point that ur not feeling the same way.
    If u don't consider someone ur friend u need to make it clear, it is not fair to the person on the receiving end. It might be something to think about ;)
    Grtz Kaylie!

  4. You know who your real friends are when you are in trouble, those who are always there for you no matter what. Sometimes one does not even consider these people as friends and ends up taking them for granted which is messed up (would you be there for them?). Hopefully one realizes this before it is too late. Friends are for life! For me it is about quality rather than quantity. Nowadays many people live with the illusion of having hundreds of friends (thanks Facebook) these people usually have 0 friends in real life....
    Greetings from CA, Roger

  5. Thanx for the Reply's I appreciate it =)